bemorelovely | fuck elias man

Skip to Main Content

fuck elias man

Jon's hesitant to leave Elias' office and no, it was certainly not because he wanted to be in the man's presence anymore than necessary. The state Elias drove Martin into, ready to sacrifice himself on the chance at something changing, that haunted Jon more than he liked to admit. It felt like a barely dodged bullet, which felt like most things these days, really.

No, his hesitance was more an uncertainty of what to do now. He dropped off the radar, from Georgie and Martin, for five days and he could only imagine how they'd both react. At least he left Georgie a note when he left to stay with Martin, she had some idea, even if it was a vague one. Martin, on the other hand, he didn't contact at all.

Yes, that... was a mistake. He knew that.

It seemed like a small thing to worry about in the grand scheme of things- people were dead, he was turning into a monster, Basira and Daisy were now tied to it and, it turns out, Elias had a kill switch to keep them all in line. Now that he saw Tim it was pretty obvious he wasn't doing well and, if Jon was going to be honest with himself, unlikely to last if all he heard was true. 'Feed your god or it feeds on you.' Tim certainly looked... lesser.

"Jon?" Elias' tone is pointed, and Jon sighs. He doesn't bother any sort of goodbye as he goes out.

He wonders, briefly, if he could avoid Martin and just... go take this statement now. He didn't want to, not really, avoid Martin at least. He sort of wanted to just convince Martin to put off everything that needed to be said so they could go to bed and just sleep, have Martin close. Maybe take the statement first, the urge was strong.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I'm not the- I'm not anything," Martin protests, but even as he does he knows that he's wrong. As much as he'd been caught up in the orbit of the Institute before, he'd been ensnared completely now. He could feel the Beholding's hooks latching into him, burrowing deeper by the moment, and he knew with a heavy certainty that if he tries to loose himself of those that he'd simply bleed out.

When Jon doesn't flinch away from him, Martin brings his hand to his mouth to softly kiss at his knuckles.

"But it doesn't matter. It doesn't. Elias was- he had to be stopped, no matter what. I wouldn't let him kill again. I couldn't."

Jon closes his eyes at that. He wishes he could tell Martin he wasn't the new... heart, head, whatever it was. Playing pretend for a few moments would be preferable to immediately facing reality. But it wasn't that simple, it never was. There was no time for playing for a very long time.

He watches Martin kiss his knuckles and his heart aches. I really don't deserve you, he thinks and choses not to say. It wouldn't make anything better. He just wraps his fingers around Martin's hand. "I know. It... it had to happen." He admits quietly before breathing quietly out his nose. "It would probably be better if you stayed home a few days. Whatever happens next will be... complicated to work through. It will be a strange transition."

"Do you think we're all going to die now?"

Martin's words are quiet, and he's focusing more on the hold of Jon's hand than his face. It's as if this is what he's chosen to ground himself to the room for the moment.

"Elias said before - something about being the heart. About us being-" His voice drops. Quiet. "Do you think I just killed us all?"

"No," Jon answers, and he really has no idea why he thinks that. He could say it was a feeling, as ridiculous as that was, but even that wasn't quite right. "I think... you replaced him in ever sense of the word. I don't really know how or why."

He exhales, closing his eyes. "I have no proof, but... I suppose we'll see. I think we'd be dead already if that was the case." How reassuring.

Martin wants to be alarmed by that, or shocked, but it's hard to feel those things when part of you already thought so, too.

"Jon," he says, and there's a soft pitch of a whine in his voice, like a dog hit by the car he was chasing. "I don't want to be Elias."

The very thought of that nearly makes Jon shudder. "You won't. You can't, you're... you're stronger than he was." He answers, and he does believe that much. Whether it would be enough in the end, that he didn't know. He didn't know if anyone was strong enough to come out of this whole.

He exhales, swallows. "I'll do everything I can to remind you to never be him. You've certainly helped me remember my... humanity."

"You're still human," Martin says insistently, cutting his eyes up to Jon, even though there's a part of his mind that says well, actually. "I mean- human enough. God, it's not like we're living in the X-Men movies. Just because you have- you can do things..."

He trails off, still a little numb, before he asks in a tiny voice: "You think this means I'll be getting a raise?"

"It's not that simple, I'm afraid," Jon has to say, regretting it but it felt too important not to. It wasn't the power of compulsion, not really, it was the smaller changes all culminating into something he knew would not come out human at all. Without Martin he was fairly sure he'd be halfway there already.

And soon Martin may find out himself, first hand, if he really was the 'heart.'

Jon barks a laugh, startled by the comment and breaking his tension. "I'd rather hope so. Might as well get something out of it." He reaches to Martin's hand, wanting to pull him up. "Let's just... go home."

Martin will take his hand, gripping it tightly before he uses it to pull himself to his feet. "Yeah," he agrees, "home." But he doesn't let them head out just yet, instead pulling Jon toward him. Kissing him again, right there, because it suddenly feels very important.

Jon doesn't take long to melt into it, a sense of 'dear god it was close this time' washing over him and making an edge of desperation to the action. It takes him a while to pull back, breathless and shaking slightly. He still felt it, something, whatever it was that was part of Martin now drawing him as much as Martin himself.

He places a hand over Martin's heart. The should go home, talk seriously about what happened next. Instead he curls his fingers and presses his forehead to Martin's.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only